I am sick and tired of being treated this way....

I have had it...

This stress that has been making my eye twitch for 6 days has finally made me burst. I have some things I need to get out. And of course, what better place than here.

First of all, I wish people would cut me some slack about my past. I am really getting tired of people bringing up or making jokes about the fact that I "used to be gay". For the record, I never slept with anyone, other than my wife. I was teased since 1st grade until high school about being gay. It got so bad, that I started to actually believe it.

Yes, I dressed in drag like 3 times, two were for a costume party and one was a dare to go with my roomate and her sister to the Mall of America and they were in freakish outfits and wigs, while I was in plain jeans and a nice shirt. Whoop de do, that really doesn't qualify me as a drag queen. Sorry.

I am also fed up with a lot of shit that Amy and I seemed to just accept from people, cause heaven forbid we should "create waves". Well I am tired of it. I am tired of people judging us and taking us for granted and not even GIVING US A FUCKING THANK YOU!

I am tired of people thinking were fat, because we eat to much or we eat too many sweet. When in truth they don't know that we eat very healthy and struggle everyday with our weight and that it is a very hard thing to deal with and that we don't keep sweets in the house.

Those people don't live with me, so it pisses me off that they go and tell their family that we're fat cause we eat to much. It's heart breaking to have someone you love, come up to you and tell you to your face that your fat.

I am tired of people walking all over Amy demanding that she do things for them (even go as far as making her re-arrange her whole schedule to accommodate them) just because she is a stay at home mom.

They seem to think she doesn't do anything all day. She is the most busiest person I know. Without her, this family wouldn't be able to function.

She cleans, get the groceries, pays the bills, helps me balance the books--budgets to finances (not only us but my sister too), takes the kids to all their activities, does tap classes, goes to a church group, volunteers for girls scouts...

She doesn't have time to help you with every little problem you have and she will not be your go-between, just because you don't want to talk to someone. Grow up and deal with your own shit.

I am tired of people thinking were made of money, just because we know how to budget and get a few nice things here and there.

I am tired of teenagers and children alike; not getting the love, attention and supervision they deserve and fear for how that is going to effect their lives as they grow older. It just seems that no one is thinking about their future and what the present can do to alter that.

I can't believe I just typed all that. I should delete it and not even post it, but part of me is tired of keeping my mouth shut and not expressing myself to someone. How can change come about it someone doesn't stand up and say something.

A Party, A Birthday, A Bitch, A Burger and A Turntable

Today we went to my sisters for a Pampered Chef party. I love that stuff and the food.

After that, we rushed off to my Nephew/God-Son's birthday party. That was cool. I got to see some family I haven't seen in a while. Cept, my brother-in-law didn't say anything to me, not a hi or nothing (found out later he just wasn't feelin well). I wondered if I did something to make him mad? But his Brother and I (who used to work with me) we talked up a storm and caught up. So that was nice.

One thing that I cannot stand: people who always seem to find something about you to nit-pick and cut you down so that they can feel better about themselves.

I won't go into specifics or whom, but I cannot stand when people feel the need to berate you to your face to make them look better than you. Especially when they don't realize they are doing it. I can understand when it is in a joking way, I do that with a few people, but I try to make sure they don't feel cut down and it is only with a select few and they joke right back. But to honestly say a comment to you face or ASSUME something. Remember people, NEVER ASSUME....all that does is make and ASS out of U and ME!

Another thing that bothers me: people who have to be the center of attention at all times. You don't need to go around and tell everyone there something about you. Lay off! It is someone else's birthday, let them enjoy the attention!

But, I guess the thing that really frosts me: is when people assume that because Amy and I are overweight, that we need large amounts of food or that when we ask for a small piece they give us a huge one instead. For Instance, Amy was helping dish people up and when it came her turn, she said, "a very small peice of cake and just a little bit of ice cream." What did she get? A peice of cake the size of three peices, and about 2 large scoops of ice cream.

Just because I am overweight, doesn't mean I do anything to make myself this way. I only eat cake and ice cream at birthday parties, I only eat candy at Easter, Cookies at Halloween and Christmas, I really hate chips. The only kind I eat are nacho chips with Salsa...and Salsa is actually good for you!

The rest of the year I am eating salads, chicken caesar wraps, chicken and pasta and veggies. Healthy food. So what gives you the right to say to someone else that I am fat because I eat too many sweets. I don't eat sweets, I really don't like sweets. I am overweight because my lifestyle doesn't give me a lot of time to be active and my job is a desk job. I can't exactly do it running on a tredmill.

It is just like in High school when people would say that I ate too many twinkies. I HATE TWINKIES! So F*CK OFF! And it is not like most of the people who say this are in any better shape, so don't use me as a way to make yourself look skinnier (or try and believe you are--I have seen the shit you eat!)

You don't know what I had to grow up with. You don't know what I battle with everyday, all the comments I have to deal with. IT HURTS people! And especially DO NOT tell your kids that Amy and I are fat because we eat too many sweets AND DO NOT TEACH THEM to make comments like that to overweight people, that is just sick and wrong! Just because you don't want them to eat that stuff, don't use me as an excuse.

Anyways... on the way back we stopped at the Bigger Burger in Elk River to see if it is as good as the ones in Sioux Falls. Verdict....YES! IT was grubbin! And Cheap! $3.50 for a bigger Burger, Fries and a really large pop. But 1 burger was plenty enough for me. Remember I DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO THINK I AM A FAT PIG.

Then we came home and waiting on my step was my new AIWA turntable! I Was so EXCITED!

We hooked everything up and tried some records that sounded really bad on my old machine and they sounded PERFECT. The turntable is made to go with my Mini-System and it really goes together well. Now I can get all my albums on CD! I am so happy. Amy said it was my father's day present. I can accept that!

Now I am just sitting here and putting my LPs onto my computer so that I can cut them, mix them and burn them onto my special Vinyl CDs that my Cool father-in-law gave me!

Ciao!